


Dirk Gently's Guide to: Christmas

by unintentionallyangsty



Series: Dirk Gently: Private Detective [2]
Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: (so much fluff), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Christmas, Christmas Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Light Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 15:12:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8993578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unintentionallyangsty/pseuds/unintentionallyangsty
Summary: Dirk Gently is, understandably, thrilled about his and Todd's first Christmas together.Meanwhile, Todd Brotzman is, understandably, a little tentative about his and Dirk's first Christmas together.This is a story of the Mistakes and Comforts they both end up finding in the season.





	

**Author's Note:**

> here we are again!  
> i'm both completely Elated that Dirk Gently's is catching on with other writers, and that the ao3 page is therefore filling up with works produced by writers far more talented than myself; as well as completely terrified by the same concept.  
> either way, i decided to force myself to Suck it Up (for once) and post this for the upcoming holiday!  
> as always, the au summary can be found within the series description. thanks!

Dirk hissed as he pulled what felt like the hundredth pan of cookies that evening from the oven, willing himself not to drop the entire effort onto the floor (unlike the first four attempts)

The entire apartment smelled of baked goods, at this point, and Dirk was more than a little excited to see Todd’s reaction when he arrived back home. 

Not that it would be anything more than fond exasperation, Dirk assumed.

Still, he’d never seen his boyfriend’s reactions to the Holidays first hand. This would be their first Christmas together (as Dirk had dreamily envisioned more than once over the past couple of months), and he was eager to see how things would unfold over the time. 

Unlike himself, Todd was notably… less enthusiastic. About a lot of things. This fact in itself was enough to make Dirk unexpectedly anxious about his favorite holiday’s quick approach.

In fact, Dirk mused distantly, the most excited he had _ever_ seen Todd (other than, possibly, their first kiss, Dirk thought somewhat smugly) was when Dirk had presented him with a new flannel and tickets to his favorite band as a birthday gift. 

(The flannel had been hinted at, multiple times, by Todd himself. The tickets had been a hunch)

To this day, Dirk was still unsure of whether the tickets or the flannel were the most well received part of the gift. 

The buzzing of the doorbell interrupted his thoughts and, after carefully setting the pan full of cookies down onto a pile of dishrags (he refused to scorch the countertop a second time), Dirk rushed toward the source of the noise eagerly. 

“Todd!” He cried, reaching for the doorknob.

It wasn’t the first time Todd had forgotten his key to the apartment (and was therefore resorted to ringing the bell like a visitor), and Dirk was sure it wouldn’t be the last. 

Either way, he was elated that his boyfriend was home earlier than he’d originally anticipated,

(whether or not the baking was actually completed)

“I’d expected-- _Oh_.” Dirk couldn’t help his face falling into a disappointed frown as he threw the door open, only to reveal Todd’s sister Amanda, standing in the entryway with an expectant look plastered on her face. 

( _Very pretty_ , he considered, _but not nearly as cute_ )

“Sorry to disappoint.” Amanda offered a small smirk before pushing her way past and into the apartment behind Dirk’s deflating form, “Didn’t mean to interrupt the big Gay Reunion. But I brought food.” She held a large, plastic bag up as proof.

Dirk attempted to hide his blush behind a flippant scoff. 

Often, he reminded himself, Amanda could sound cold and distant about a lot of things; most things where Todd was concerned, in fact. 

At first, Dirk had been a little Put Off by the behavior and hadn’t quite known how to react. 

_“She really likes you.”_ Todd had reassured, when Dirk had admitted to his uncertainties, smiling in what Dirk assumed he probably thought was an encouraging fashion, but in reality just came off as a bit constipated, _“Probably more than she likes me...”_

Now that he’d grown accustomed to Amanda’s somewhat… odd personality, Dirk knew that, were he to rally the behavior with his own Best Attempts at sarcasm and bitterness, he could usually end the interaction feeling somewhat okay about the whole thing. 

(most of the time)

“I don’t know what you mean.” He bluffed, frowning forcefully in attempt to cover his previously flabbergasted expression. 

If Amanda’s dramatically raised eyebrows were anything to go by, he’d missed the mark by quite a lot. 

“Well,” He sputtered, when it grew apparent that Amanda wasn’t going to reply anytime soon, “What about you and-and Farah!” He grinned triumphantly, “Certainly there are a lot of… Gay Reunions going on there!” 

Amanda shot him a look. 

“That’s different.” She deflected easily, wandering into the kitchen before stopping and eyeing the spread before her as if taken aback, “What went on in here?” 

Dirk grinned, tired of keeping the expression off of his face, and rushed to stand before Amanda with his back to the mess. 

“Christmas Baking!” He cried, scoffing a little when Amanda only pegged him with a deadpan look in response, “Duh!” 

“Oh, ‘duh’” Amanda mocked, grinning a little herself before hoisting herself up to sit perched on the edge of the counter and _perilously_ close to knocking a large baking tray to the floor.

She dropped the plastic bag of food to the floor unceremoniously, and Dirk tried to hide his wince. 

“Has, uh-” Amanda was saying, reaching out to pluck one of the cookies off the nearby sheet, “Has Todd mentioned how he feels about all of, um, _this_?” 

“Well, no.” Dirk replied immediately, grinning in building elation, “He hasn’t seen it yet. It’s meant to be a surprise, really. First Christmas together and all that. He’ll probably laugh at all the extravagance but, well…” He trailed off when he noticed Amanda’s blank expression, “Well… Maybe it was… Amanda, I’m really trying to read your expression here and all I’m reaching is that this was a Not Good decision, so--” 

“No!” Amanda cried, a little too quickly, dropping the half munched cookie in her hand to her lap with the force of the word, “No, Dirk it’s great.”

Dirk preened a little, only to sober when Amanda continued to look just as pensive as before.

“It’s just… I’m pretty sure the only Christmas ‘baking’ Todd has ever done wasn’t quite like, well… This.” Amanda continued, shooting him a sympathetic look.

Dirk frowned, “I’m not quite sure I follow. Was he bad at it?”

Amanda paused, taking a long moment to study him closely before raising both eyebrows significantly. 

“Not,” She reiterated slowly, as if explaining something to a child (which, Dirk thought, was a little unnecessary), “ _This_ kind of baking.”

“What like…” Dirk drew the words out slowly, “....Brownies?”

There was a pause in which they both stared at each other, noses within inches of each other’s, before Amanda groaned dramatically and buried her face in her hands.

“ _Dirk_.”

“Oh!” Dirk replied immediately, his eyes widening with the sudden realization, “You meant _that_ kind of-- _oh_!” He shrugged nonchalantly, “Well, you do live in Seattle.” 

“ _We_ live in Seattle.” Amanda pointed out, sounding a little exhausted, “But yeah. Christmas has never really been a… thing, for Todd.” She paused before muttering, “Not like it _should_ be.” 

Dirk wrinkled his forehead curiously, “What do you mean?” 

“Well,” Amanda began matter of factly, hopping down from the counter while simultaneously reaching for another cookie, “if there’s anyone who deserves a happy holiday, filled with ‘laughter and cheer’ and all around _good_ feelings, things like that; Todd is probably the least of them.” 

Dirk blinked, trying not to feel stung by the words.

“Amanda,” He ventured, a little cautiously, given the circumstances, “Have you something… Against Todd?” 

Obviously, Dirk knew that Amanda and Todd’s relationship, while (according to Todd himself) apparently very close in the past, was a little rocky and… well, _forced_ was the best word Dirk could really think of to describe the way the siblings interacted around each other. 

Still, he was a little eager to hear firsthand what Amanda herself had to say on the subject.

(Though he admittedly felt a little guilty for the urge)

Amanda, meanwhile, was screwing her expression into one of pure shock. 

“Have I…?” She laughed a little, the sound tinged a bit with discomfort, “I-Yeah, I guess you could say that. I have a lot against Todd, as I’m sure _you’re_ well aware, you being his… Well, you being his, and all.” 

Dirk nodded, ignoring the jibe at his and Todd’s relationship (all in good nature, he was sure) in favor of schooling his features into that of a pleasantly interested individual. 

“Mmhmm. Right. Care to elaborate, at all?” 

Amanda frowned sharply. 

Ah, probably coming on a bit strong with the curiosity, then. 

Dirk smiled and blinked, scratching at his ear and scrambling to correct the error. 

“I just mean,” He sputtered, “There must be some reason you hold so much against your brother.”

“I- Well I’m...” She paused and took a deep breath, “Look, I’m sure you know about the money, right?”

“If you’re referring to Todd lying to both you and your parents for _years_ on end during his time in college about a number of financial situations that were _drastically_ exaggerated, if I may assume, only to increase his own personal well-standing then,” Amanda shot him a wary look and tensed visibly, so Dirk thought it best to carry on, “Then yes, I’m very aware.” 

Amanda studied him, “And you’re not… Put off by that. Like, at all?”

Dirk shrugged easily, “If I’m to assume correctly, and at this point I think I am, college for Todd was years ago.”

There was a pause, before Amanda sighed and scratched her head wearily. 

“I guess so.” She murmured, letting the matter drop but not sounding entirely happy about it.

“Now, can _I_ ask _you_ a question, Amanda?” Dirk asked, leaning forward eagerly. 

“You-” Amanda quirked a brow, “Dirk, you’ve asked all the questions.” 

“Right.” Dirk dismissed, “One more, then.”

Amanda paused before nodding hesitantly. 

“Why do you keep visiting? If you have so much to hold against your brother, and all that? Why,” Dirk gestured to the food at their feet pointedly, “This?” 

Amanda opened her mouth to retort, before closing it again and breathing out a long exhale through her nose. 

“He’s-Todd’s trying, alright?” She stuffed her hands into her pockets and shrugged, “Since meeting you he’s really, really attempted to turn things around. He was a loser before you two met.” Dirk opened his mouth to argue but Amanda held up a silent finger in warning, “A _loser_. But now he’s actually trying and he’s… _honest_.”

Dirk pursed his lips, nodding and mulling the information over slowly in his mind; storing it away for later evaluation.

(In reality, he was really trying very hard not to preen at what was pretty much the closest thing to a compliment Amanda had ever outrightly given him)

“You look pleased.” Amanda teased, smirking and basically confirming that he hadn’t hidden his true feelings so well, after all. 

Dirk sputtered, and Amanda took the opportunity to skirt around him and back toward the front door.

“I’ll see you around, Dirk!” She called over her shoulder, still smiling a little self-righteously. 

“Amanda, wait!” Dirk called, once he had recovered himself enough.

Amanda paused and glanced back, one hand already pulling the front door open. 

“What about you?” Dirk asked. 

“What about me?” Amanda repeated, furrowing her brow in confusion.

“You and Christmas.” Dirk explained, quickly, “What’s your… relationship, with the holiday?”

Amanda blinked, before grinning widely. 

“I like Christmas baking.” She replied simply, before exiting completely and closely the door behind her with a soft _click_. 

\---

As it turned out, Todd was a little more than exhausted when he returned home later that evening. 

By that point, Dirk had been lounging in the kitchen, multiple plates piled high with baked goods sitting before him on the countertop and just waiting to be appreciated. 

However, Todd had given little more than a wry chuckle at the mess, before he’d turned his eyes on Dirk (eyes that were filled with an emotion so close to Love that Dirk’s pulse had fluttered spectacularly) and tackled him in a quite Fantastic kiss. 

Later ( _quite a bit later_ ) they were both laid out on the sofa, Dirk lying on his back and Todd snuggled practically on top of him. 

Todd wasn’t usually much of a snuggler, Dirk mused, and he revelled in the small moments like this that he got a chance to hold his (significantly) smaller boyfriend close for an extended period of time. 

“Good day?” Dirk murmured, rubbing Todd’s shoulder gently when it seemed he might be close to drifting off to sleep (probably well deserved)

Todd hummed in reply, shifting until his chin was propped on Dirk’s chest, and he could smile hazily up at the latter. 

“Better now that you’re here.” Todd mumbled, his eyelids fluttering for a moment before snapping back open. 

“Todd…” Dirk ventured, studying his dazed looking boyfriend for a long moment, “Todd are you-- Have you been… Baking?” 

Todd blinked, before breaking down into a fit of giggles that turned into full out laughter in a matter of seconds. 

“N-No.” He wheezed, after having caught his breath again, “No, Dirk. I’m not stoned.” 

“Oh.” Dirk replied, deflating a little, “No band practice today, then?” 

Todd smirked, “No, I bailed for an interview.” He flushed a little, “I got an interview.” 

Dirk beamed approvingly.

“Well done, Todd!” He cried, rubbing Todd’s shoulder again, firmly, “I’m sure they loved you!”

“Yeah.” Todd replied lowly, sobering again but still flushed in a way that told Dirk he was still a little pleased, “I guess we’ll see.” 

Todd grew silent again, turning again so that his cheek was pressed back up against Dirk’s heart, and Dirk thought it best to change the subject before the oncoming sulk set in firmly. 

“Oh!” He cried with somewhat forced gaiety, “Amanda stopped by today.” 

“Yeah, I saw the food.” Todd replied, gesturing somewhere behind them toward what Dirk assumed he must have thought was in the direction of the kitchen, “Did she.. Say anything?” 

The heavy pause and noticeable tension in Todd’s small shoulders was enough to indicate that the news had made him more than a little nervous. 

Dirk sighed sympathetically, weighing the situation in his mind.

On one hand, it might be prudent to let Todd into the frantic whirring his mind had been going through since Amanda’s harried departure. 

The entire situation was, he mused, not something that he was entirely unaware of before his and Amanda’s “chat” that afternoon. However, their exchange had shed a great deal of light on the subject, and Dirk was torn in between sharing this new understanding with Todd and keeping the whole thing to himself; this mostly to spare the latter’s discomfort. 

“Not really.” Dirk replied finally, wrinkling his nose and making a snap decision, “Though I’m still not entirely sure that she likes me.” 

Todd chuckled. 

“She likes you.” He reassured, shooting Dirk a small grin. 

Dirk grinned back, confident that he’d made the right decision when faced with Todd’s bright ( _beautiful_ ) smile.

“I like _you_.” Dirk replied, grinning a little wider with the force of the statement.

Todd flushed, but continued smiling, to Dirk’s elation. 

“And I like you.” Todd murmured, gaze trained far ahead instead of on Dirk, but smile held firm, just the same. 

This Dirk counted as a victory, and he tightened his hold on his smaller boyfriend, snuggling closer. 

\---

Three days later, the easy comfort of that brief time spent on the sofa was gone, and Todd Brotzman found himself standing listlessly outside the nearby outlet mall, his hands shaking minutely and his breath low and shallow. 

“Okay, Christmas shopping.” He murmured, low and almost desperate, “Find something for Dirk. This should be… manageable.” 

A couple skirted around Todd’s motionless figure in order to get to the entrance, turning around and shooting him odd, curious looks and effectively breaking him out of his self-imposed haze. 

He took a long, deep breath before propelling himself forward, the metal of the door handle under his hand cool and somewhat comforting. 

And how pathetic was that, Todd mused, that he was already in need of comfort over something as simple as Christmas shopping. 

Twenty minutes later, and he was rethinking the whole idea entirely.

“Amanda!” Todd cried, willing his hand to stop shaking as he pressed his phone to his ear desperately, “I need your help.” 

There was a long, suspicious pause on the other end of the line, prompting Todd to exhale a breath in frustration. 

“Not that kind of help.” He reassured, “I need… Christmas help.” 

“Christmas?” Amanda echoed blankly, her first words over the phone tinted with disbelief, “Todd, are you _Christmas shopping_?” 

Todd took another shaky inhale, eyeing the forebodingly crowded Macy’s aisleways from the tight corner he’d wedged himself into at the very back of the shoe department. 

“Uh, yeah.” He croaked, rolling his eyes at Amanda’s disbelieving snort, “Really. And I need your help.” 

“I’m having a hard time seeing how this isn’t about money.” Amanda retorted, sounding anything but sympathetic. Todd couldn’t say that he blamed her. 

“It’s not.” He soothed, anyway, “It’s about… Dirk.” 

There was a long pause, before Amanda giggled, the sound loud over the crackling phone line and full of amusement. 

Todd found that the sound soothed his nerves almost instantly, despite being relatively sure he was being outrightly mocked. 

“He’s your boyfriend.” Amanda finally replied, a grin still in her voice, “Shouldn’t you know what to get him?” 

“Um… Yeah.” Todd replied slowly, gaze listlessly trained on a pair of violently red loafers on the shelf across him, “And, um, no. I mean, I’d kind of like a second opinion.” 

“Okay.” Amanda agreed immediately, and Todd could practically see her sitting at rapt attention, as if fully expecting a disappointing answer, “So what are some of your options?”

Todd blinked, multiple times, a little stunned at the blatant question. 

“Um, you know…” He swallowed, “Shoes?” 

“Oh my god, Todd.” Amanda groaned, “I’m hanging up.” 

“Wait, wait! Amanda!” Todd cried desperately, ignoring the sharp look a woman shot him from the next aisle over, “What are you getting for-for Farah?” 

Amanda snorted, “I finished my shopping days ago.” She replied easily, sounding entirely too proud of herself, “You know it’s the day before Christmas Eve, right?” 

Todd sighed, dejected, “Yeah, I just--”

“You put it off until now.” Amanda interrupted, but there was no sharp edge to her tone, “Not like I can say I haven’t done the same. Do you even have the money for Christmas shopping right now?”

“Yeah…” Todd muttered, slowly, ignoring the disbelieving snort he got in reply, “I can afford a couple Christmas presents.”

“Right.” Amanda returned, and Todd could practically see her raising both eyebrows sarcastically, “Todd just-- Just get him what you know he likes. It’ll work itself out.” 

Todd paused, before the tight band around his lungs seemed to loosen, and the tension that seemed to have taken up permanent residence in his shoulders ebbed slightly. 

It was, he reflected, probably the least hostile couple of sentences Amanda had spoken to him in months. 

“O-okay.” Todd breathed, reaching a hand up to rub at his suddenly aching neck, “Thanks, Amanda.”

“Just don’t… Overwhelm yourself.” Amanda commented, after a pause, “You know how you get.” 

Todd chuckled humorlessly. 

“I won’t.” He replied, pretending he didn’t already feel the sweat beginning to slick his palms, “Amanda--”

“I have to go, Todd.” Amanda interrupted hastily, “Bye.” 

“Oh, okay. Talk--” The line clicked dead, and Todd sighed heavily before stuffing the phone back into his pocket in defeat.

It wasn’t a lot, he mused, but it was probably the most civil conversation he’d had with anyone (besides Dirk, of course) in ages.

And probably would be for a while longer yet, Todd mused with little humor. 

In any case, Todd felt a renewed sense of vigor as he forced himself out of his hiding place and back into the chaotic fray of the store ahead.

He could do this. It was just Christmas shopping, after all. 

\---

“I’m doomed!” Dirk cried dramatically, his only answer being Lydia’s sympathetic blink from across the living room. 

“Christmas is two days away, Lydia. Two days!” Lydia barked sharply, as if indicating that she were listening, “And I haven’t gotten Todd anything. Well--” Dirk turned to eye the small pile of presents under their plastic (Todd was allergic to anything else) Christmas tree in the corner, “Practically nothing. Nothing… _Big_.”

Lydia whined, a low and sad sound. 

“I know.” Dirk agreed, grabbing at his hair desperately, “It’s not _my_ fault Todd never talks about anything he wants. It was hard enough getting this much.” 

In reality, Dirk had made an… educated guess on most of the presents he’d already purchased for his boyfriend. Todd was hard enough to shop for on a good day, and practically impossible for something as important as _Christmas_. 

“I already got him a flannel.” Dirk mused, lowly, gesturing toward the tree offhandedly, “He doesn’t really need anymore of those. What if I got him… Shoes?” 

Dirk thought pityingly of Todd’s dirty sneakers that had clearly seen better days, but Lydia seemed to frown at the suggestion, so he dismissed it as well.

“You’re right, of course.” He admitted, “He’d probably go back to wearing the ratty old ones, anyway. But what does he really… really _like_?” 

Lydia cocked her head significantly. 

“Well, besides you and myself, of course.” Dirk amended agreeably, “He has pointed out our similarities multiple times and-- Oh!” Dirk’s eyes widened, and he began to grin slowly, “Oh, of course. _Oh!_ ” 

Before he had a chance to rethink the idea, Dirk was snatching his vibrant blue jacket up from the sofa hastily, shrugging it on and speeding toward the door. 

“Thank you, Lydia!” He called, eagerness causing his pulse to race dramatically.

Behind him, Lydia barked happily, effectively convincing him and sealing the deal in his mind entirely.

\---

“Todd!” Dirk cried, sitting up suddenly and effectively dislodging Todd’s (previously) comfortable position with his feet planted firmly in Dirk’s lap. 

“Ugh.” Todd grumbled in return, raising the beer in his hand dramatically to avoid spilling it in the jostle, “Dirk, what?”

They’d been perched on the sofa, Todd numbly taking in whatever film was playing on the gently murmuring television (something in black and white, as Todd could be predictable like that) while Dirk had been spending his time instead studying the softly glowing Christmas tree from across the room, reflecting smugly on how he’d convinced Todd to put it up at all. 

(Todd had resisted valiantly, saying they didn’t need a tree for it to be Christmas, after all; but Dirk had given his best effort at a pout until Todd had relented grudgingly)

It felt like home, Dirk mused, a sense of pervading warmth blooming in his chest, tinged with something a little close to fear; like the whole thing was balanced precariously on some kind of edge, threatening to land in either total comfort or complete disaster. 

Either way, Dirk allowed himself to feel completely happy about the way the holiday was shaping up in that moment. 

However, there was another small thing he thought might complete their first Christmas together entirely.

“What if,” Dirk began, satisfied that Todd’s attention seemed to have been drawn away from the television, for now, “We went to the market tomorrow?” 

Todd quirked a brow, “The market like the… store?” 

“No!” Dirk cried quickly, making Todd blink a bit, “The market as in the Market! The, you know, _Market_!” 

“Do you--” Todd blinked again, “Do you mean Pike’s Place?” 

“Yes!” Dirk cried, leaning forward eagerly, before wrinkling his nose a bit at the face Todd was giving him, “Really, Todd, don’t give me that look. You can’t expect me to know all the names of all the places here already. I’ve hardly lived here a year.” 

“But it’s Pike’s Place.” Todd argued, clearly trying to stifle a giggle. 

“Whatever.” Dirk dismissed, shrugging a shoulder before pressing, “So? What do you think?” 

Todd studied him a long moment, eventually turning back toward the television and taking a long swig of his beer before answering. 

“Sure.” He croaked, clearing his throat a bit before continuing, “I’ve never been for Christmas but it could be… fun.” 

Dirk beamed, before clearing his own throat and attempting to school his features into something a little less eager. 

“Great!” He cried, shooting Todd a small smile before leaning forward to scoop his boyfriend’s feet forcibly back into his lap. 

“Ah?!” Todd cried, just barely managing to avoid choking on a sip of beer, “ _Dirk_ \--”

“Tomorrow then.” Dirk interrupted, pretending to give the TV his rapt attention for all of 7 seconds before his resolve broke and he sent Todd a small, satisfied grin. 

Todd smirked, but made no attempt to move his feet. 

“Tomorrow, then.” 

\---

“I can’t believe you agreed to something like this.” Dirk cried gaily, trying to refrain from hopping in his elation and, instead, extending a hand to grasp Todd’s gloved hand in his own mitton-ed one tightly.

The two were, after only minimal complaining from Todd, striding in the freezing temperatures toward the public market. 

Todd had attempted to convince Dirk to go earlier in the day, given that the market might be “crowded on Christmas Eve” and that it would be, “freezing after dark”

Dirk had held firm to his belief that the experience would be best enjoyed when the market itself was lit up spectacularly with its Christmas light display and, after very little convincing, Todd had agreed with little more than an exasperated chuckle.

“Yeah, well.” Todd replied, coughing a little uncomfortably and giving Dirk’s hand an almost imperceptible squeeze, “If it makes you happy.” 

The last sentence was uttered on little more than a whisper, but Dirk heard it all the same and felt his cheeks flush with pleasure in response. 

He made no attempt to hide the reaction, and shot Todd a gleeful smile instead. 

He was met, rather than with a returning smile like Dirk had expected, with Todd gazing blankly ahead, small worry lines already taking up residence between his eyebrows. 

Dirk frowned, his good mood effectively doused a little at the less than enthusiastic response. 

“Something wrong there, assistant?” He pressed, attempting to keep the good humor in his tone.

Todd smirked.

“I’m not your assistant.” He replied immediately, “And nothing’s wrong. I’m tired. Don’t worry about it.”

“You’re _always_ tired.” Dirk teased, bumping Todd’s shoulder with his own good-naturedly and feeling a little excitement begin to bubble within his chest again, “Lazy man, Todd.”

Todd chuckled wryly, “It’s probably your fault.”

“Probably.” Dirk replied, trying to hide a grin and using the opportunity to snuggle closer. 

“I--” Todd broke off, tripping a little, “Dirk, I can’t walk like this.” 

“Guess you’ll have to put an actual effort into it.” Dirk replied matter-of-factly, refusing to move and pressing his shoulder up against Todd’s firmly. 

Todd laughed, outright and a _beautiful_ sound if Dirk had ever heard one, but made no effort to move away. 

The market itself was a little more crowded than Dirk had expected, and he remained pressed tightly to Todd’s side as they entered the chaos, his eyes wide and trying to take everything in at once. 

“This is…” He trailed off, gazing at the scenery in barely concealed awe, “Todd, this is incredible.” 

Though he wasn’t looking, Dirk could practically _feel_ Todd’s amused smile.

“You’re like a kid at Disneyland.” He chuckled, “I can’t believe you’ve never been to Pike’s Place before.” 

“No, no--” Dirk replied, tearing his gaze away to glance back down at Todd who stood looking expectantly up at him, a smile still playing at the corners of his mouth and the Christmas lights illuminating the contours of his face in such a fashion that the breath was taken out of Dirk’s lungs in one fell s _woosh_.

“I--” Dirk sputtered, feeling suddenly a little lightheaded and enraptured with the image before him. 

Todd’s smile grew a little.

“Alright there, detective?” He muttered, and oh, _really._ That was just a bit unfair. 

Dirk swooped in, catching Todd’s mouth with his own shyly, and grinning a bit into the kiss when Todd pressed back eagerly. 

“Alright, assistant.” Dirk replied breathlessly, when they’d broken apart, dutifully ignoring the smug grin working it’s way onto Todd’s face, “And, for your information, I have been here before.” 

Todd’s eyebrows rose a little in shock, “Really?” 

“Yes.” Dirk replied with his own smug smile, “Just never like--” He turned back to the scene before them happily, “Like _this_.” 

Todd blinked, before smiling a little and retaking Dirk’s hand in his own, leading them both onward and into the market’s center. 

\---

The evening, Dirk had thought, was going incredibly well. 

Todd seemed willing to follow Dirk toward whatever he wanted to see, nodding along pleasantly when Dirk found something new or interesting to carry on about. 

It was, therefore, a bit of surprise when Todd’s mood took an almost complete turn; and not for the better. 

They’d been standing in front of a jewelry booth, studying the offers halfheartedly when Dirk had caught sight of an opal necklace, and was promptly reminded with unexpected force of a case he’d worked on back in London over a year before. 

“It was a _brilliant_ case, Todd.” Dirk explained eagerly, his cheeks flushing for what felt like the hundredth time that evening with his enthusiasm, “The amount of _clockwork_ that had gone into it. And I solved it! Well,” He paused modestly, “ _We_ solved it. The agency and myself. But I did a good load of the work.” 

Todd had chuckled loudly, clearly as caught up in the moment as Dirk himself felt. 

“I’ll buy it for you!” He offered, tone lighter than Dirk could remember hearing it in _weeks_. 

Dirk blinked, “What, really? For me?” 

“For Christmas.” Todd confirmed with a nod, grinning widely at him before turning to the vendor politely, “How much for that one?” 

The price, as it turned out, was 85 dollars; a bit outrageous in Dirk’s opinion but then, it _was_ a nice piece of craftsmanship. 

Which was when the evening began to tilt. 

Todd seemed to freeze where he stood, his shoulders tensing slightly before the rest of him even had a chance to catch up. 

“Todd?” Dirk prompted, glancing between his still boyfriend and the expectant vendor anxiously. 

“R-right!” Todd cried, a little too loudly, and shifted so he could reach into his pocket for his wallet. 

His hand, ungloved when they had entered the stuffy halls of the market, slipped out of Dirk’s own, and only then did Dirk register how slick with perspiration it had become. 

“Um, Todd.” Dirk murmured, gently now, “You don’t um-- you don’t have to buy it.” He shot an apologetic smile at the vendor, who was pegging them both with an expression only growing in impatience.

(Rude man) 

“N-no.” Todd stuttered, fumbling his wallet a bit before pulling out his credit card shakily, “I want to.” 

“Todd.” Dirk repeated, firmly, reaching forward and intercepting Todd’s slowly outstretched hand, “You _don’t_ have to.”

“I--” Todd began, giving his card a little tug when Dirk grasped it firmly, “I _want_ to.” 

“ _I_ ,” Dirk mocked, feeling a little out of his depth and trying to ignore the stares the vendor and multiple parties crowded around were pegging them with, “I don’t want you to!” 

Todd blinked, taking a small step back as if completely thrown for a loop, before he frowned sharply. 

“Dirk,” He muttered lowly, “Give me my card.” 

Dirk took a deep breath.

“No.” 

There was a heavy pause, in which Todd’s eyes widened almost comically. 

“ _Dirk!_ ” He snapped, then, effectively breaking the silence and wrenching the card from Dirk’s now limp hand sharply before heaving a breath, meeting Dirk’s eyes--

And striding away defiantly. 

Dirk blinked, his mouth falling open in shock before his mind completely registered the situation. 

“Todd.” He whispered, then cried, “Todd, wait!” before rushing after his boyfriend’s disappearing form, ignoring the vendor’s parting scoff of disbelief. 

( _Incredibly_ rude man)

“Todd!” Dirk cried when he caught up, gripping Todd’s arm tightly and jerking the both of them to a halt, “What _was_ that?” 

Todd, still facing away from him, took another deep, heaving breath, but neglected to answer.

Dirk opened his mouth to repeat the question, when he noticed the minute trembling of Todd’s bicep beneath his fingers. 

He furrowed his brow in confusion, “You’re not well.” 

It was spoken as a statement, not a question, but Todd turned around at the words and shook his head. 

“I’m fine.” He replied flippantly, “I-I’m sorry.” 

Dirk studied him for a long moment, taking in the dark circles under his eyes (always present anyway, but _still_ ) and the barely there clench to his jaw before making his mind up entirely. 

“You’re not.” He replied firmly, moving his hand so it was grasping Todd’s own instead, “And we’re going back home.” 

“Dirk,” Todd began, though there was little conviction behind the word. 

“We’re going home.” Dirk repeated, forcing himself to stand firm and hoping his tone brooked no argument. 

And, after a moment, it seemed it hadn’t.

Todd frowned, but turned and began exiting the market slowly.

Dirk followed dutifully behind, giving Todd’s hand a reassuring squeeze, and feeling his own breathing begin to even back out when Todd returned the squeeze almost immediately. 

\---

Dirk woke slowly, allowing himself a moment to revel in the warmth surrounding him, and the soft, pliant body pressed up against his own. 

Beside him, Todd snuffled softly in his sleep, nosing sleepily at Dirk’s shoulder and making the latter grin with pleasure. 

Though he would have loved to get to the root of last night’s… issue at the actual moment the issue itself had occurred, Dirk had forced himself to remain silent (for Todd’s sake); waiting until Todd himself was ready to discuss the situation before he brought it up again. 

Unfortunately for the both of them, that could be forever.

Todd stirred again, yawning lazily and effectively tearing Dirk from his own thoughts.

“Good morning.” Dirk murmured past a yawn of his own, refusing to open his eyes quite yet. 

Todd hummed in reply, before his mind seemed to catch up to the events of the evening prior and he froze, his shoulders tensing almost immediately. 

“Ah, none of that.” Dirk mattered, finally prying his eyes open and reaching out a hand to rub Todd’s shoulder soothingly. 

Todd was sat with his head elevated, eyeing Dirk with a hesitant expression. 

“Dirk,” He began, swallowing nervously and letting his head fall back to the pillow with a soft _thump_ , “I need to apologize for… for everything, last night I mean. I--”

“You-you don’t have to talk about it, yet.” Dirk interrupted, taking pity on his poor boyfriend and his haphazard apologies, “If you’re not ready.” 

“I’m not.” Todd replied immediately, with a dry chuckle, “But I feel like I need to. So…”

“So.” Dirk repeated, allowing himself a long moment to study the ceiling before shifting to lay on his side and meeting Todd’s startled gaze head on.

“I--” Todd stuttered, furrowing his brow and grimacing before averting his gaze and blurting out, “I’m broke.” 

Dirk blinked, shocked by the admission not because it was, well, _shocking_ , but because Todd had spoken it as if it were supposed to be news to Dirk. 

He thought it best not to say exactly this out loud, however.

“Well, duh.” He said instead, smiling a little, “You’re unemployed.” 

Probably not the best response either, Dirk thought with an internal wince, but Todd didn’t seem to be too terribly perturbed.

“B-but,” Todd stuttered, blinking rapidly, “You probably thought I had like-- savings, right? Doesn’t everyone have that?”

Dirk shrugged, “ _I_ don’t know!” He replied gleefully, scooching a little closer to Todd’s still figure and sobering slightly, “But that doesn’t really make a difference to me, you know.” 

“I-I know.” Todd replied, with so little hesitation Dirk couldn’t help but feel pleased, “I just thought-- It was a little disappointing, what I did.” 

Dirk frowned, as if mulling the words over. 

“I don’t know.” He replied, finally, “I think we’ve both done our fair share of disappointing things. Besides,” He shot Todd a small smile, “You won’t be broke for long. You’ve had an _interview_ , remember!?

Todd paused, before huffing a laugh. 

“Yeah.” He replied, smiling a little but looking like he might otherwise let the conversation drop entirely.

“ _Oh_!” Dirk cried, jolting and sitting up so suddenly that Todd flailed in a quite undignified manner, “Merry Christmas, Todd!” 

Todd smirked and sat up also, albeit a bit more slowly.

“Yeah, Merry Christmas.” 

Dirk shot him an affronted expression, “You remembered it was Christmas and you didn’t _tell_ me?!” 

“Well, yeah.” Todd scoffed slightly, “It’s Christmas. Of course I remembered.” 

“Fine.” Dirk shot Todd a mock frown, “I suppose you want your gift now, then.” 

“Now?” Todd blinked, “Shouldn’t we do like… Breakfast?” 

Dirk paused, frowning slightly, “Is that what people do? For Christmas?”

Todd shrugged and made a noncommittal sound.

They stared blankly at each other for a long moment, before Dirk cleared his throat uncomfortably and turned away to rub his neck a bit. 

“Well,” He began slowly, “Maybe not. Let’s just do--Presents…?”

“Presents.” Todd confirmed hastily, flushing a bit, “Do you--”

“Yours first!” Dirk interrupted, practically leaping out of bed and startling Todd badly, by the looks of it, “I just have to go retrieve it.” 

“Retrieve…” Todd trailed off, “We could just both go out to the tree, y’know.” He smirked slightly, “I think that’s probably customary.” 

“Oh, it’s not under the tree” Dirk replied dismissively, already on his way out of the room, “The nice neighbor lady has been watching it for me. Won’t be a moment!” 

“Neighbor lady.” Todd echoed blankly, before leaping out of bed and scurrying after Dirk hastily, “Dirk, what? She’s what? I-- Oh, Lydia.” He cut himself off, bending to greet the Corgi when she came racing into the room at the sounds of her parent’s awakening. 

Brilliant dog, Dirk mused happily. 

“She’ll probably want to be fed.” He exclaimed, ignoring the suspicious look Todd was shooting him in favor of hurrying toward the front door, “Again, it won’t be a bit!” 

The task, in reality, only took Dirk about five minutes; and that included wishing their elderly neighbor a happy Christmas and staying to chat for a bit. 

When he returned to the apartment, his gift wrapped firmly between both arms, he found Todd sitting listlessly on the floor with his back against the sofa, a wrapped gift in his lap and his eyes trained firmly on the Christmas tree in the corner of the room. 

“Back!” Dirk called happily, effectively stealing back his boyfriend’s wayward attentions.

“Hey!” Todd replied, grinning so wide his cheek dimpled a bit. 

Dirk froze in the entryway, his heart suddenly twisting almost painfully; the sight before him so completely unexpected but so absolutely _perfect_ that he could hardly breathe. 

The moment must have stretched on a bit Long, however, for Todd’s smile faded a little as he furrowed his brow. 

“What’s wrong?” He prodded nervously. 

“Nothing!” Dirk replied almost immediately, grinning a bit dazedly before turning to stare at the gift in his arms, “Oh, right, your gift.” 

He scuttled forward, then, bending before a now thoroughly confused looking Todd and dumping the Gift in his lap unceremoniously. 

Todd jolted, before freezing almost completely to take in with slowly widening eyes the tiny, yawning black kitten that Dirk had thrust upon him.

He remained silent for so long that Dirk found himself becoming increasingly nervous, his gaze flickering rapidly between the squirming kitten and Todd’s bewildered expression.

“You--” He cleared his throat, “Do you… Not like it? It was a hunch, really. I didn’t know for sure but--”

“It’s great.” Todd interrupted, a smile slowly but surely making it’s way across his face, “I love her.” 

“Well,” Dirk replied promptly, trying not to reveal just how pleased he felt at the admission, “I figured, since we already had one child who takes after me,” He gestured to Lydia, who was now watching the proceedings from her perch in the corner warily (but with little hostility, Dirk noted with some relief), “I figured it was time to get one who was a bit more like…” He gestured to Todd, as if it were explanation enough. 

Todd giggled a bit, grinning down at the kitten before the words seemed to catch up with him and he shot Dirk a skeptical look. 

“Dirk,” He warned, “I am nothing like a cat.”

“ _Todd_ ,” Dirk mocked teasingly, “Please. The signs are all there, I mean _really_.”

They both glanced back down at the kitten, who was now nestled snugly against the crook of Todd’s elbow and drifting soundly off into a nap.

“I uh, I got you a present, too.” Todd began after a minute, flushing a bit and shifting so that he could hand the wrapped parcel in his lap to Dirk without jostling the now sleeping kitten, “It’s nothing very exciting. I mean, especially not as good as this, but--”

“Don’t be silly, Todd.” Dirk interrupted, shooting Todd a small, private smile and already tearing away at the sloppy wrapping job eagerly, “I’ll love whatever you could possibly get me.”

“Well,” Todd murmured, averting his gaze and definitely flushing now. 

Dirk took a moment to admire the scene before him (Todd, flushed and happy with the kitten curled comfortably in his arms) before smirking and diverting his attention to the now wholly unwrapped gift. 

“Todd!” He cried, making both Todd and Lydia jolt a bit, “It’s wonderful!” 

He proudly held up the recently unwrapped gift; a vibrantly yellow-colored pleather jacket, and beamed brightly at Todd from behind the fabric, feeling his own cheeks flush with pleasure. 

“You--” Todd cleared his throat, “You don’t _have_ to like it. If it’s not your style or…”

“Oh, please.” Dirk dismissed, already shrugging the jacket on over his pajamas happily, “What about this _isn’t_ my style?” He shot Todd another grin, “I love it, Todd. Really.” 

Todd blinked, before huffing slightly, a grin of his own spreading slowly across his face. 

“You,” He began, glancing briefly down at the kitten before meeting Dirk’s gaze again, “Are actually kind of incredible.” 

“Oh, _actually_.” Dirk repeated, grinning widely now, despite his best efforts.

He paused, biting his lip and taking a deep breath before propelling himself forward to capture Todd’s surprised and pliant lips underneath his own.

“As are you.” He whispered when they’d broken apart, taking the moment to appreciate Todd’s post-kiss face while it lasted; his eyes fluttered closed and cheeks stained a flattering pink.

“Happy Christmas, Todd.” Dirk murmured, taking Todd’s hand and winding their fingers together.

Todd smiled as he met Dirk’s gaze from under his lids, and tightened the hold of his fingers almost unnoticeably. 

“Merry Christmas, Dirk.”

**Author's Note:**

> it's me again! i still do Not have a beta so if there are any uncaught mistakes here i apologize wholeheartedly  
> this story, now that i can reflect, was probably the fluffiest thing i have ever posted.  
> honestly, i am still So Nervous about mischaracterizing these characters, as well as falling into their Character Stereotypes.  
> i really hope that i was able to do them justice here! (especially considering how unexpectedly long this piece turned out to be)  
> as always, i can be found at my tumblr [here](http://suitablyhip.tumblr.com) where i may not reply Right Away, but would definitely love to chat! i absolutely adore hearing from you guys!  
> thanks so much for reading!! much love!


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